Archive for the ‘Editors' Blog’ Category
August 25th, 2010 | 
Author: by Karen Frazier, Managing Editor
Paranormal Underground Magazine
I’m kind of a geek. Or maybe that’s a dork or a nerd. From what I hear, there are different definitions for each, but I have yet to sort through which is which or know which one applies to me.
Anyhooo….regardless of my classification on the whole geek/dork/nerd spectrum, I really like to contemplate things that just flat out blow. My. Mind. The more trippy, the better as far as I’m concerned. As a kid I would lay awake at night and try to contemplate how big infinity was – and how far that meant the universe went on if, indeed, it was infinite. As my mind would trip outward farther and farther probing the boundaries of infinity, I would get to a point where I’d realize that I had no concept for what it meant. And even if the universe wasn’t infinite, I further reasoned, surely there had to be something outside of the universe. Was it just a huge ball suspended in a vacuum? Pretty heady stuff for a six year old, let me tell you.
Even today as a 44 year old, it is hard to envision – what lies outside of the realms that we understand – the realms of time and space that we know either experientially, experimentally or theoretically. But it doesn’t stop my far less agile brain from still tripping along, just as I did when I was a six year old lying in bed and contemplating something I could barely understand.
That’s why I love articles and news items that really challenge the universe that I know perceptually. Things that make me wonder if we do, indeed, move only forward through time or question the nature of what our mutual perceived reality is as human beings.
An article in the Huffington Post on August 18 caught my eye. In the article, scientist and theoretician Robert Lanza takes a look at experimental findings that seem to indicate that time is not what we perceive it to be. Instead, the findings on experiments with photons indicate that the causal relationship between the past and the present (where the past affects and leads to the present but the present doesn’t affect and lead to the past) may not exactly be what we perceive. Instead, it appears that the present may just affect the past as much as the past affects the present.
I’ll pause a moment to let you ponder that and then use your best Bill and Ted voice to say, “Whoaaaaaa……..”
If the present can – not just theoretically, but experimentally – affect the past, then what does that say about what we believe we know about the nature of time?
Time as we understand it is divided into three distinct parts – past, present, future. What we know of the past is affected by a few factors – including recorded histories and personal memories. Brain science has shown, however, that what we think we remember about our own individual histories is highly subjective and highly flawed, because we filter personal history through our own world-view, education, perceptions, experiences, self-concept and more. It is why several different people can have several different memories of the exact same event in a shared history. What it comes down to is that there is no true shared history, because each of us perceptually filters our experience and memory of history through our own highly subjective filters. Even in the case of recorded history, these subjective filters come into play. That’s because the person recording the history is still subject to the same biases that we all have. Since history is usually written by the victors, the versions of recorded history that become part of the collective consciousness are still, at their very core, incomplete histories based on the biases and filters of the observers who recorded them.
In other words, in a very real sense, history as we know and understand it is a bunch of hogwash.
The future, on the other hand, is the vague unknown. I don’t care how psychic you are, there is no way of projecting a future with 100% certainty. Too many random factors come into play that affect outcomes. The future can’t be real because we just don’t know how each of the millions of random bits will come together.
That leaves us with the present. Something we can surely rely on, right? Unfortunately, we can’t even really rely on the present as much of a yardstick for reality, because those same subjective filters that come into play as we narrate our histories also affect how we experience our current realities. If we could shut our minds up and merely be in the moments of pure experience, we might come closer to approximating an experience of objective reality, but the second that pure moment of experience had past, our individual filters would immediately kick into spin mode once again, and we’re left with an inaccurate memory of that moment of pure experience.
As I think about this stuff, I become the six year old kid again – unable to wrap my mind around what is real, what is perceived and what is purely illusory. And for me, it leaves me in an interesting place. While I elect to buy into my perception of what is real most of the time in order to keep my bearings, the truth is that I have no clue what reality is. For all I know, everything that I am experiencing right now is merely a projection of my mind – this keyboard, this chair in which I am sitting, the noisy ankle-biter dogs who are running rampant through the house playing – it could all just be some huge illusory mind @#$% that I am creating in order to give myself a solid sense of reality.
It’s a concept that not only boggles my mind – it excites it. Because within all of this, I can see endless possibility. What I don’t know can fill up that big, infinite universe I used to try to envision when I was a kid, and I’m pretty sure that you could fit what I do, actually know 100% without hesitation on one of the many angels that fits on the head of a pin.
Enjoy Karen’s blog? Karen’s new book, Avalanche of Spirits: The Ghosts of Wellington> is now available. Click here to buy.
by Karen Frazier, Managing Editor
Paranormal Underground Magazine
Movie: Inception
Genre: SciFi
Rating 4-1/2 stars out of 5
If you haven’t seen Inception yet, then get ready to have your mind boggled. While the movie isn’t difficult to follow, it does take a while to sort out, and I’m still sifting through it this morning after seeing it last night.
Cobb (played by Leonardo DiCaprio) is a man with a dark past which is slowly revealed throughout the movie. He works in dream corporate espionage – obtaining corporate secrets through the experience of shared dreaming. He is also a fugitive expat, unable to return to the United States without facing charges for killing his wife.
Cobb meets Saito (Ken Watanabe), a powerful and wealthy Japanese businessman who wants Cobb to use his gifts in a different way – inception, or the process of implanting an idea through shared dreaming. Saito promises that if Cobb can plant an idea in the subconscious of the son of his chief business rival, he will make sure that all of Cobb’s problems in the US will disappear and Cobb will be able to return home to his children.
Cobb and Saito assemble a team and begin to plan the process of inception by creating a three level dream within a dream within a dream scenario in order to plant Saito’s idea.
At its heart, Inception centers on a theme common in movies – the long con. Where it is brilliant, however, is in its implementation. It weaves together multiple layers into a single, complex story line that will leave you thinking about it long after you’re done watching the movie.
The movie is well acted by a terrific cast – Ellen Page, Leonardo DiCaprio, Joseph Gordon Levitt, Tom Hardy, Ken Watanabe and Dileep Rao play the inception team convincingly, and each moves the action forward well.
Inception isn’t mindless escapism. There is a lot here that will leave you wondering about the nature of dreams and the nature of reality. It is well worth the price of admission, however. Inception will keep your mind spinning, long after you leave the theater.
Enjoy Karen’s reviews? Karen’s new book, Avalanche of Spirits: The Ghosts of Wellington> is now available. Click here to buy.
by Karen Frazier, Managing Editor
Paranormal Underground Magazine
The world can be a pretty negative place, that’s for sure. While I notice it in the paranormal community, the truth is that it is out there everywhere. It isn’t unique to the paranormal. Heck – there’s a whole bulletin board devoted to trolling and negativity (the infamous /b/ board at 4chan). It’s pretty easy to hide behind an avatar and a bad attitude where you don’t have to look into the eyes of another and see the hurt you may be causing with your words and actions.
And yet, it’s easy to get swept up in the negativity. The minute someone behaves like a total douchebag, I can fully understand the instinct to go into full-on defensive mode. Especially when you notice that others agree with your assessment of the situation – the temptation is there to join up like a gang of playground bullies who band together to pick on the offensive turd who set you off in the first place. There are a few times when I’ve had to pull myself back from the almost overwhelming desire to join the mob with my own pitchfork and torch to chase down a monster.
If it stayed on the Internet, that would be one thing. After all, we all have our choice of the material we look at when we surf the Net. In most forums, if we don’t like a troll we can ignore them. We can choose not to read blogs by people we find offensive. We can choose not to engage in flame wars. We can walk away with the click of a browser button.
The problem that I see is that the trolling and negativity seems to be seeping over into real life. It’s not staying on the interwebz. Maybe it’s just that I’m an adult now and not under the protection of my rather sunny and naive view of the world any longer, but it seems like real-world encounters with hostile jerks are becoming more common. In the past year, I’ve witnessed people screaming at others with no provocation, people hideously mistreating the poor unfortunate saps who are forced to serve them in the course of their jobs, and some of the most vicious backstabbing behaviors I have ever encountered. I personally have been screamed at in a failed attempt at bullying and intimidation, had lies spread about me, and had to step away from people I thought were my friends because of constant negativity and attacking behaviors. It makes it tough for a girl to keep her rose-colored glasses perched firmly on her nose.
I don’t remember that the world was always this unkind. Or maybe I was better at ignoring it and avoiding the negative people out there. It’s hard to know. It is also discouraging. After all, I’m raising a teen-ager who will soon become an adult in a world that seems to be peopled with an awful lot of individuals who have somehow checked their humanity at the door. Or maybe it is just that the planet has gotten smaller with the advent of the Internet, and that we are now in communication with people we would never have met in days gone by.
Whatever the reason, here’s the one thing I do know. I have zero control over all of the negativity that exists in the world. I can’t control the trolls, the douches and the a-pipes. I have no control over what is said on the Internet, and I have no control over how others behave or treat anyone else (including me). There is only one thing in this universe that I control, and that is myself. Therefore, in my world it is entirely up to me to eliminate the negativity.
How? By not participating. By walking away. By trying to do what I learned as a child – treat others the way that I’d like to be treated. I can step away from relationships that are negative. I can not take my bad day out on other people. And when other people decide to take their bad days out on me, I can decide whether or not I let it affect me.
It’s the only thing I can come up with, this humble plan of mine. I can only combat negativity in my own life, in my own attitude and in my own interactions with other people. What everyone else chooses to do is up to them.
Enjoy Karen’s blog? Karen’s new book, Avalanche of Spirits: The Ghosts of Wellington> is now available. Click here to buy.
by Karen Frazier, Managing Editor
Paranormal Underground Magazine
I recently came across something in a shout box on a paranormal group’s website. The group is one that has a regular haunted hangout, and they’ve become somewhat associated with the place even though many other groups investigate the location as well. The message in the shout box was along these lines:
“You’re wasting your time there. The souls there have been released.”
And yet – the groups who go there, psychics who visit there and even visitors to the location not seeking out paranormal activity all continue to have experiences that suggest that the spirits haven’t gone anywhere.
It’s actually an experience I’ve had firsthand. I was once following several paranormal groups all involved in a large group investigation of a location. My job was the same one I’ve had many times before – follow people around and ask questions like a perennial three-year-old. It’s my calling in life, really.
Many of the teams had psychics with them, but one psychic in particular was very theatrical. Derek Acorah theatrical, if you know what I’m saying. She swept through the rooms of the location one after the other telling all of the spirits that as soon as she was done talking with them, she would release them. Then she would proceed to have a one-sided conversation (or at least it sounded one-sided to us) before dramatically sweeping her hands out in front of her in a whooshing motion, when she would dramatically declare that the spirits had been RELEASED!
Taa daa!!!!!
Last I checked, that location has just as much haunting activity as it ever did. Either it’s a fresh new batch of spirits, or there may be a glitch in the whole releasing of spirits system.
Do we humans even have the “power” to release spirits? And if we do, is it our job to do so? I’ve mentioned this before, and it is always a controversial subject. There are many who will tell you that it is absolutely, 100% the responsibility of someone who comes across a spirit to try to help that spirit get to the other side because that spirit is trapped. Others take on a more Prime Directive type of approach – observe, report, don’t interfere.
It’s something I struggled with myself when I first started to encounter what I thought were the souls of the dead. What was my responsibility? Did their communication with me mean that they needed me to do something? Was it my responsibility to help them find the Light and get to it like Jennifer Love Hewitt on that ghost show?
I arrived at my own philosophy in this regard, which I am comfortable with, but which I have been told many times is a cop out. For the record, I don’t feel it is. Want to hear about it? Here’s how it goes….
1. When we encounter something paranormal, we’re not entirely certain what it is that we are dealing with. We have theories, certainly. It definitely could be a human soul. It could be residual energy. It could be a piece of residual energy. Bottom line – while we think we have a definition of “ghost,” it is a working definition at best. I’ve yet to see an infallible scientific explanation that proves that what we experience as ghosts are indeed human souls.
2. Let’s pretend for the sake of argument that ghosts are, indeed, human souls. The entire soul – every piece of the human consciousness that once existed in a body is now floating around in soul form as a ghost. Even if we knew that 100%, would we have a responsibility to “release” that soul? I believe that it is the height of arrogance to say that I know what is best for any soul – ever. I believe that each soul has a path that is unique to that soul. I also believe that I can’t know what another soul’s path is. Hell – I barely know what my soul’s path is. I stumble and thrash around in the dark daily trying to figure that out. So how can I say what the path of another soul is? And if I can’t know another’s path, then how do I know what is best for that soul? How do I know that the soul should be released? I can’t insert my beliefs and will on another soul. To do so is a brashly arrogant way of asserting my belief system onto another.
3. Say that, in spite of the above, I still decide to “release” a soul because I’m feeling an insouciant touch of brash arrogance one day. How do I know how to release the spirit? How do I know that if I do a little soul releasing magic, I won’t actually inadvertently send the soul somewhere else (or send it anywhere for that matter?)
4. This one isn’t mine. My friend, Bert Coates of NWPIA talks about it, and it makes sense to me. How do we even know that the Light is good? It could be a trick! We. Have. No. Clue.
And so – clueless as I am, I’m not comfortable in attempting to try and release a soul or even suggesting that a soul needs to find a way to release itself.
Before those of you who regularly assist souls to the Light get your dander up, please understand this. I know that you do what you do with the best of intentions. If you feel that what you are doing is clearly the right thing for you to do, then by all means get to it. We each have to develop our own personal belief systems and philosophies, and you are just as entitled to yours as I am to mine. I’m merely explaining mine, and I feel that FOR ME to attempt to release a soul, it would be irresponsible and ultimately selfish and arrogant. That doesn’t mean that if you do it you are those things. It means you’ve developed your own way of doing things that works for you.
I was having a conversation with a gentleman just this past weekend. He has some psychic intuition, and I asked him about his philosophy of sending spirits to the Light.
“I would never presume to do something like that,” he told me. “Maybe if a spirit asked me to help them in that way, I would try to see what I could do. But in all my years of doing this, I’ve never had one ask.”
If you enjoy Karen’s blogs, then check out her new book, Avalanche of Spirits: The Ghosts of Wellington, which is now available from Amazon.com.
by Karen Frazier, Managing Editor
Paranormal Underground Magazine
Watch out, folks. There’s a new breed in town and they’re called para-jerks. Nope – I’m not talking about a new class of paranormal evidence like jacket tugs. I’m also not talking about ghosts, cryptids or aliens with attitude problems. Instead, I’m talking about those groups and individuals in the paranormal field who feel as if they must cast aspersions on everyone who is not them.
I spend a lot of my time meeting paranormal investigators from various groups and I’ve got to tell you – most of you are amazing people. Kind, open, friendly and passionate about what you do. You’re all eager to share your methodologies, hear what other people do, share stories and experiences, share evidence – all of it. Some of you are even screamingly funny – and there is a special place in my heart for people who can make me laugh so hard that I cry. Or wet myself. Perhaps I’ve shared too much…
What I’m trying to say to many, many, many of you wonderful paranormal investigators that I’ve met is this: I love you man! While I may not always agree with your theories and methods, while you may not always agree with mine, you are the salt of the earth – people after my own heart who have a passion for what it is that you do and a willingness to share it with a rather chunky paranormal reporter/neophyte investigator who never lost a three-year-old’s propensity for asking questions. You all have taught me so much by sharing your world with me, and I am eternally grateful.
Alas, this is not the feel good blog of the year. I’d love to end it there and I probably should, but I think I’ve got a little something to say.
There’s another type out there who I’ve deemed the para-jerks. Okay – that’s not quite true. In my head, the language is a little bit harsher, but this is a family website. These are the groups who seem to lack the confidence to stand on their own theories, beliefs, methods and accomplishments. Instead, in a rather misdirected attempt to make themselves look better, they spend a great deal of time slamming other groups and individuals. They do it on their websites. They do it in their investigations. They tell anyone who will listen how much everyone else sucks.
Hey – I understand marketing. I am a former marketing guru who spent nearly 20 years marketing people’s stuff. It’s perfectly okay to highlight what makes your group special and unique. It’s perfectly okay to show how great you are. It’s even okay to distinguish yourself from the pack. That’s marketing. But when your efforts to this end start to resemble political attack ads, then maybe, just maybe you might want to tone it down a little.
*Cue spooky music and snarkastic (it’s a word I made up combining snarky and sarcastic – like it??) man’s voice:*
Paranormal Donkeys of Upper Chicago End (Para-DoUChE) believe they saw a ghost. They think they’ve captured EVPS. But what Para-DoUChE didn’t tell you is that they once used a Ouija board. Can you trust a group with members that played with Ouija boards when they were 13? Are these the people that you want in your homes interacting with your ghosts? Come on, Para-DoUChE, surely you can do better than that.
*spoken quickly* Paid for by Citizens for Paranormal Association of South Southampton (Para-ASS).
I kid the para-jerks. Sort of.
Here’s the deal, folks. When we turn to petty infighting, when we slam others in the field in a misguided attempt to make ourselves look better, when we talk about how much everyone else sucks because they are not us, it diminishes all of us. And I’m not just talking about the people you are slamming. It diminishes you, as well. It diminishes the field as a whole and makes the entire paranormal community look like a bunch of squirrelly, mean-spirited a-pipes who can’t get our crap together. To outsiders, it looks like a train wreck – a paranormal version of the Jerry Springer show. Since a true passion for the paranormal is already considered a rather fringe belief anyway, is this the impression that we want to make on the world? That we’re all a bunch of backstabbing jerks? Let’s leave that to the politicians.
I get that I’m starting to sound a little negative here, so I have a challenge for everyone. Take a look at the information you’re putting out there into the world. Take a look at ALL of your communications. Your websites, your literature, your blogs, your tweets, your Facebook status updates, the way that you communicate about other groups when you are out in the world representing not only yourselves, but the paranormal community at large. Now ask yourself this: Are we talking ourselves up, or are we putting others down? The two are not necessarily conjoined twins. It’s very possible to share how terrific you are without ever once mentioning how much the other guys suck. And in doing so, you’ll be doing yourself and everyone else in the paranormal community a huge favor.
Paranormal research isn’t a competition. It is different things for different people: a hobby, a personal journey, a passion, a means of exploring the universe, a way to alleviate fears, a way to explore the unknown, a thrill ride. There are as many reasons for exploring the paranormal as their are people who explore it. I know because I’ve asked almost everyone I’ve met in this field why it is that they do what they do. I’ve never gotten the same answer twice. So whatever it is to you, it’s all good – but here’s what it doesn’t have to be. It doesn’t have to be a mean-spirited way to make yourself look better than everyone else. It doesn’t have to be the Springer-esque cat fight that diminishes everyone.
Take a step back. Look around. Are you contributing to progress, or are you contributing to drama? If the answer is drama, is that why you wanted to get into paranormal research in the first place? If it is, then carry on. If it isn’t, then you just might want to find a way to reconnect with that initial passion without the drama.
Here’s something that I love about the universe. There’s only one thing that we can control in this world, and it isn’t the other guy. So if we can’t control the other guy, why worry so much about what it is he’s doing? Instead, why not share your passion with the world? Let your light shine – because there is no doubt that there is something about you that is unique and amazing. In the end, the entire community (you included) will be better off for it.
If you enjoy Karen’s blogs, then check out her latest book Avalanche of Spirits: The Ghosts of Wellington which is available from Amazon.com.
by Karen Frazier, Managing Editor
Paranormal Underground Magazine
I get a little cranky some days. It’s tough to be in the middle. People thinking fence sitting is easy, but I’m here to tell you different. It’s not. Having those fence posts poking you in the rump can be a real pain.
What on earth am I talking about, you ask? I try to withhold judgment. I try to evaluate each and every thing that comes my way on its own merits – free from any belief or lack of belief that I have in certain phenomena. I’ve made it very clear that I’m a never say never kind of a gal. We live in a huge universe where all sorts of things are possible. Certainly some are more unlikely than others, but let’s face it, unlikely does not mean impossible.
One of the problems with being a fence sitter is that I’ve never really fit into one crowd or another. I am widely panned by both “sides” of issues. The bottom line is this: I have come to believe in the existence of ghosts. 100% I believe that ghosts are not only possible, but that they exist and certain phenomena that I’ve experienced are indicative of this existence. Just because I believe that what we’ve labeled as ghosts exist, however, doesn’t mean I have a darn clue what they truly are. Interdimensional travelers? An imprint? An active soul from the past that exists in disembodied form? Who knows? Certainly not me.
And just because my personal experiences have led me to believe that ghosts do, indeed, exist doesn’t mean that every experience I have, every odd photo anomaly and ever odd blip on a digital recorder is evidence of a ghost. I apply critical thinking to each and every situation. When my critical thinking allows me to reach the conclusion that what I experienced had a natural, logical, non paranormal explanation, then I am accused of being the biggest cynic out there and refusing to see what is right before my eyes. I get lots of lectures that go something like this: “You need to keep an open mind. You just don’t know because you’ve never encountered a ghost. If you HAD, then you would realize that this is paranormal.”
I would?
Then there are the opposite times when I comb through everything, look at all of the circumstances and I arrive at an explanation that seems paranormal to me. Now I’m not a cynic. Instead, I’m an idiot for arriving at a paranormal explanation. Surely I’ve discounted science! In order to have reached the conclusion, “paranormal,” I would have no other choice but to do so. Yep – that’s me, the silly believer who follows the pack and believes anything and everything that goes bump in the night is paranormal.
Oh wait. No I don’t.
I’m a reasonably intelligent person. I read both paranormal stuff and scientific stuff. We have subscriptions to Scientific American and Discover magazines. I read them cover to cover every month. I get Google alerts for the paranormal every day. I read paranormal magazines and paranormal websites. I am well aware of the full spectrum of what is out there – both paranormally and scientifically. And just because I sometimes reach opposing conclusions for different situations doesn’t mean I am eschewing one in favor of the other.
That’s because I believe that it is possible for both to exist side by side. I’ll pause a moment to let that sink right in. Maybe, just maybe, the paranormal can be real and science can be valid. Perhaps God could exist and science wouldn’t have to overturn hundreds of years of research. Maybe even though I believe I’ve experienced ghosts, I still have a healthy respect for science.
Here’s the thing. In some cases, we have to just follow where the preponderance of evidence is pointing us, because the answers are almost never absolute. It’s relatively easy to compile the evidence and see in which direction it weighs more heavily. Juries in civil cases do it all of the time.
We don’t know everything. We’re still learning all sorts of sciency new things on a regular basis. And if that’s true, then it just seems to me that there are pockets of this universe that science has yet to catch up to.
I know there are people out there just like me. The non-extremists who realize that the world is nuanced and that new and unusual experiences need to be evaluated one at a time on their own merits. I’m not on a “side,” but that doesn’t mean I don’t have a point of view. I do and here it is. I respect science. I adore science. But I also respect the broad range of experiences we have. When science can explain those experiences, I’m all for it. But when it can’t, that doesn’t mean I have to toss it all out the window. I’m quite content to leave some experiences in my life in the realm of the unexplained.
Join us tonight from 6 to 8 PM Pacific (9 to 11 Eastern) as we interview Professor Paranormal, parapsychologist Loyd Auerbach. Loyd is always informative and entertaining when he discusses some of his most interesting cases and his well-researched theories of the paranormal.
Hope you’ll join us tonight at 6 PM Pacific on ZTalkRadio.com.
Reviewer: Karen Frazier, Managing Editor, Paranormal Underground Magazine
Book: A Paranormal Casebook: Ghost Hunting in the New Millennium
Author: Loyd Auerbach
Genre: Paranormal Non Fiction
Rating: Five stars out of five
Words can not describe how much I adore and respect Loyd Auerbach. His studied take on paranormal phenomena is equal parts refreshing, entertaining and informative. While A Paranormal Casebook has been out for a while now, if you haven’t read it, I’d highly recommend it. In the book, Professor Paranormal himself takes a look at some of his most interesting cases.
For those who aren’t familiar with Auerbach, he’s a parapsychologist with an impressive resume. He bases his theories of the paranormal on the past hundred years of research into paranormal and psychic phenomena, as well as his own experiences in the field. You can learn more about Loyd on his website, www.mindreader.com.
But enough about Loyd. Let’s talk about his book. Like the author, the book is equal parts enlightening, entertaining and informative. In it, Auerbach talks about some of his most interest cases – like his ongoing experiences with Cady – the Blue Lady of the Moss Beach Distillery, a private residence poltergeist haunt involving strange globs of water and his experiences on the USS Hornet among others. He also shares knowledge gained through research and helpful tips about ghost hunting.
If you haven’t read A Paranormal Casebook, I’d high recommend scaring up a copy.
Join us tomorrow on Paranormal Underground Radio at ZTalkRadio.com from 6 to 8 PM Pacific. We’ll be interviewing Professor Paranormal himself, Loyd Auerbach.
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by Karen Frazier, Managing Editor
Paranormal Underground Magazine
It may be the Percocet that I’ve been taking to manage my kidney stone pain, but I realized recently that my blogs have been rather revealing of just how neurotic I truly am. It’s all out there in black and white for all of the world to read. Ready for more? I always find that reading about the neuroses of others helps me feel better about my own, so I’ll just say this. You’re welcome.
Bats have always struck me as vaguely paranormal animals. They kind of creep me out – these little flying rodents with their sharp little teeth and their creepy black wings. I can remember camping as a kid with my family and watching bats fly through the air above me. It was not a warm fuzzy feeling. As a matter of fact, I used to be afraid to go to the outhouse after dark because I was certain that either a bat was going to fly up out of the depths of the commode and bite me in the butt. Or maybe it would be hiding in the eaves of the outhouse just waiting to pounce and get tangled in my hair.
Yeahhhh……neurotic much?
I’m embarrassed to admit it, but I am still not fond of using the outhouse in the dark. Okay – well I’m NEVER thrilled to have to use an outhouse, but sometimes it is out of necessity. If it’s after dark, I make sure I keep the interior lighted up with a flashlight and I wait a moment after opening the lid just to make sure that nothing flies out. You have no idea how much I wish I was kidding about this. Apparently when I was listing my phobias last week, I should have added bats and dark outhouses to the list that included snakes, clowns and sensible shoes.
Here’s what’s funny. I totally get how ridiculous this fear is. Both the outhouse thing and the bat thing. And yet, I can’t help myself. I’ve thought it through rationally and it’s just plain silly. Almost SNL skit silly. But the fear persists.
Which leads me to the bat story. I know I’m not alone in being creeped out by the little foaming at the mouth, rabid rodents with their papery black wings and those HUGE FANGS. I once read that a bat could actually bite you, and their teeth are so razor sharp that you will not feel the bite and could be unaware that you are infected with rabies. I think this may be especially true in dark outhouses. Or maybe if a bat manages to get tangled in my hair and bites me while I sleep.
Our house is one of those houses that is in town, but in the woods as well. We have a large number of woodland critters who make regular appearances on our property – deer, raccoons, squirrels, bunnies, mice, birds, peacocks and – oh yeah, bats.
When we first moved into the house, we had bats in our basement. I counteracted my concern about the basement in two ways. A) I never went into the basement – I sent Jim; and B) when I had to open the basement door, I would open it just a crack, grab whatever I needed and then slam it really fast to make sure no bat could slip through the tiny crack when I wasn’t looking.
Still, one night a bat made it into the house, courtesy of the cat. We had a black cat named Emily at the time, and she came trotting into the house. Because she was black, no one saw the black in her mouth – until she let it drop after about four steps and it took off flying. Sure ’nuff. It was a bat. Chaos ensued.
The bat immediately disappeared. It was nowhere to be found, but it was in the house. Possibly hiding in my toilet. With that knowledge, my mind immediately flashed on how bats could bite you and you wouldn’t know it. And so, my mission became to find the bat.
Tanner was about seven at the time, and not fond of bats himself. After searching fruitlessly for the bat, we were at a loss. It was then that I had the brilliant idea. Follow me here, keeping in mind that desperation may actually cause cloudy thinking:
Bats eat mosquitos, right? So maybe if a bat heard a mosquito in the house, it just might come out. Right? Right???? My plan was brilliant in its simplicity. I went online and found a downloadable ringtone that was a mosquito buzz. It was one of those high frequency ring tones that supposedly no one over a certain age could hear because the frequency was too high, but young ‘uns could hear it just fine. I downloaded it to my laptop. Then Jim, Tanner and I went on the hunt.
Tanner grabbed a tennis racquet and put some socks on his hands/arms. Jim grabbed a racquetball racquet and some protective gear. Only to cover his hands and head. Otherwise, all he was wearing were his boxers. Tanner had on some kind of helmet and gloves. I just had my computer. I clung to one of Jim’s arms. Tanner clung to my arm. Very slowly, the three of us began to walk through the house. Every few seconds, I would push the button on my laptop that played the mosquito buzz. Every time I did, Tanner would scream and grab his ears, yelling, “It hurts! It hurts!” Jim and I, of course, had no idea what he was talking about, because we couldn’t hear the darn thing. We are, apparently, of that certain age.
Every time Tanner would scream, Jim would snarl, “Would you shut up?” and I would ask, “Do you want me to stop?”
“No…no,” Tanner kept saying. “We have to find that bat or it will bite us in our sleep.” Oops. Good mothering there. That was my fault.
We did this for about an hour before we admitted defeat. The bat was not going to come out of its hiding place – not even for a juicy mosquito that only he and the boy could hear.
I, however, was unwilling to have my entire family infected by rabies in our sleep. That’s where brilliant idea #2 came into play. I made Jim pitch the tent in the middle of the living room. We all dragged our bedding into the tent, zipped up tight and slept in there.
That night, in the middle of the night, I heard the vertical blinds rattling. Very quietly I nudged Jim.
“It’s out there,” I whispered. “I can hear it rattling the blinds.”
It was a smart bat. It disappeared the second Jim unzipped the tent.
I called the exterminator, and he wasn’t able to get to the house for a few days. In the meantime, we slept in the tent every night and stepped around it during the day. No stinking bat was going to bite us while we were asleep. I opened cupboards, closets and commodes with caution.
When the exterminator came, he took a look at the tent, listened to my fears and rolled his eyes. Not so I could see him, but the eye rolling was going on in his brain, I’m sure of it. He took a look around the house and told me that the bat was probably either dead or had found a small crack to slip out of. He told me that bats were so tiny that if it died in the house, we would probably never, ever find it. Swell. He also told me to take down the tent and sleep in our beds. We were not in danger.
Somewhat reassured, we returned to our own bedrooms that night. For several weeks, however, I pulled things out of my closet with care. I was certain that bat was hanging upside down on one of my hangers under my clothes and/or hiding in my shoes laying its bat eggs or whatever bats do to reproduce.
Six years later, I am happy to report that no one in my family died of rabies, and I never stuck my arm in a sweater sleeve only to have something fly out and get trapped in my hair. Maybe the bat escaped down my toilet where it lies in my plumbing just waiting for me to enter the bathroom one dark night.
If you enjoy Karen’s blogs, then check out her new book, Avalanche of Spirits: The Ghosts of Wellington, which is available from Amazon.com.
by Karen Frazier, Managing Editor
Paranormal Underground Magazine
Benign happy childhood icons or something more sinister?
On tonight’s broadcast of Paranormal Underground Radio (6 to 8 PM Pacific on ZTalkRadio.com), we’ll be talking to the newest guy on SyFy’s Ghost Hunters International, Scott Tepperman. One of the interesting little tidbits in Scott’s bio is that he’s a Juggalo – a fan of the band Insane Clown Posse. I’ve never listened to or heard the band, but I know they have a lot of fans.
One of the reasons that I’ve never heard the Insane Clown Posse is this – fear. I don’t have a lot of phobias, but I have a few. They are, in no particular order:
-Snakes
-Sensible shoes
-Clowns
I find clowns creepy enough in and of themselves, and I can only guess that the band does the whole clown face painting thing. That would be enough to keep me cowering under my seat all by itself; but, if they are also (as advertised) insane – then I’m pretty sure I’d find insane clowns even more frightening than your garden variety creepy clowns. Just saying….
Funny thing, fear. It can be so irrational. One can see how I might be afraid of slimy snakes – after all, they are all slimy and wrappy and poison and bitey and stuff. And certainly the sensible shoes phobia would make a helluva lot of sense to you if you knew me well – given that I am also vaguely afraid of ugly handbags. The clowns one though – it doesn’t necessarily make any sense. Aren’t clowns happy icons of childhood, with their shiny balloons, menacing red noses and terrifying giant feet?
I would go on, but I now have myself freaked out and will very likely have to spend the next hour or so curled up in the fetal position in my shower crying as I try to scrub the images of creepy clowns from my mind.
I bring this all up for a reason, and not just to show you all that I’m slightly off kilter and could probably benefit from several months (years?) of therapy. I wanted to talk a little bit about fear.
When I was younger, I used to love really scary books and scary movies. Loved them. It was so much fun reading or watching something truly frightening and getting that delicious shiver of fear. I know I am not alone in this pursuit – there’s a reason why horror is such big business and why kids crowd around campfires to share ghost stories. With the safe fear that comes from listening to a story or watching a movie comes a tiny hit of adrenaline. Safe fear satisfies our primal need to feel victorious after surviving through a “fight or flight” situation.
So here’s my problem: I haven’t had the opportunity to feel triumphant like that in a while. It seems that as I’ve delved into the paranormal, it’s become more difficult to scare me. Books and movies that others find positively frightening just seem kind of “ho hum” to me. The most I can muster these days is a little bit of apprehension during an investigation – but not enough to really get that adrenaline pumping.
I’ll be honest. I kind of miss the fear. Nothing has come along in a good long time that has caused that shiver to run all up and down my spine. And maybe it isn’t that I’m braver now – maybe it is that nobody can write a good, scary story anymore. Or maybe it’s time for me to up the ante and find something that really gives me a good fright. A trip through the snake house at the Woodland Park Zoo. A day of shopping at the Naturalizer shoe store. Or maybe I should just head out to the nearest clown college or the next Insane Clown Posse concert or Juggalo convention. That ought to get my blood pumping.
Listen to Karen and Rick Hale on Paranormal Underground Radio. Tonight’s guest is GHI’s Scott Tepperman. The show airs from 6 to 8 Pacific (9 to 11 Eastern) on ZTalkRadio.com.
If you enjoy Karen’s blogs, then check out her new book Avalanche of Spirits: The Ghosts of Wellington which is now available from Amazon.com.
Posted in Blog, Editors' Blog |
Tags: fear, Ghost Hunters International, Insane Clown Posse, Juggalo, paranormal underground radio, phobias, Scott Tepperman, SyFy |
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